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I better get practicing!

I'm not sure what came over me.  I signed up to run a 5km race on 10th March. 

I walk.  I walk for hours. I walk for miles. 

But I do not run. 

MANY years ago, I joined a running club, with the sole target of learning to enjoy running.  I see the joy it brings people.  It has never brought me joy. Not once. Not ever. I've hated every step I've ever ran. That "runner's high" forever eluded me, I hated every run, and so I entered a 10km race, and told myself that if I ran every step, without walking, I'd never have to run again.  I managed it.  And I've never so much as trotted, in the 15 or so years since. 

So why the fuck I entered a 5km, I actually don't know. I'm doing it alone, not with any pals, not for a charity. Just weird. 

Running is so hard for me.  I hate it. It's not so much a physical thing, my body is more than capable.  It's a mental thing. As I type this, it really must be 15 years since I tried to run, but I'm sure these things will remain as they ever were.  When I run I
* swear a lot
* feel angry at everything
* throw strops
* cry

I remember a lovely ex army guy was whipping me in to shape, back in the day, and as we were doing a fartlek session (basically go flat out for 200 yards, then easy, then flat out on repeat) I threw a massive hairy fit and stopped and headed back to the car declaring "I'm not doing it!" he calls after me "You CAN do it Jo!" and I roared back "I didn't say I CAN'T do it, I said I don't fucking want to!!!!"

And that about sums up my relationship with anything over a brisk walk! 

Oh well.  What's the worst that could happen, eh?! But I've just realised it's only 4 weeks away, I better get cracking on the C25K program, because my body has no memory of 'how' to run, because I promised it, it wouldn't have to do it again...

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